Is Chivalry Dead?

Maybe I was born in the wrong era or maybe it's because I live in the South where men are known for treating women as ladies and acting like gentlemen. But I expect certain behavior from men in general and men in my life in particular.

This past weekend, I was on a crowded bus being shuttled from a football game out to the parking area when an older lady entered the bus where there was standing room only. In addition, she was rather vertically challenged and reaching the handholds above was a little stretch for her. Two men were seated to my immediate right but neither offered this woman a seat. As the bus lurched its way across campus, we were all swaying and struggling to maintain balance. She stumbled at one point and her friend who was seated told her to sit in her lap. One of the men made the comment that she could sit in his lap; that he'd probably enjoy that or something to that effect.

Now I'll just say I was already ticked that this man had not offered his seat to a woman. I didn't care that he didn't offer it to me. Frankly, I was younger than him and although I believe a man should offer his seat to a woman, I was probably more agile than he and better able to stand for the ride. However, for him not to offer his seat to an older woman and to make such a comment was the height of disrespect as far as I'm concerned.

Call me old-fashioned or what you like. I adore, and have greater respect for, men who treat women as a treasure. Do I want to be respected by men? You bet. And I earn that respect by my own behavior and conduct. But do I also want to be adored and treated as a precious and priceless treasure? You better believe it. I love having doors opened for me and being the recipient of courteous and thoughtful gestures. It makes me feel as though someone is looking out for and taking care of me. Sure I could open my own doors and take care of myself and I do all the time, but having a man who extends those actions towards me makes me feel more of a woman and makes me look at him as more of a man.

So much chivalrous behavior has fallen to the wayside in the name of women's lib or equality. I question at times the high cost of what we're giving up in order to obtain that. Are we forcing men into roles that are not natural to them? By women's very own actions, are we pushing men to treat us as they would other men? No matter how strong or how tough we are as women, we have a softer side that enjoys being indulged and cared for by a strong man.

My views on the roles of men and women could go on and on. Perhaps that's the topic for another blog when I have a bit more time.